Listening across the divide: high-quality listening promotes speakers’ state wellbeing through basic psychological need satisfaction during disagreements

Saluk, D., Itzchakov, G., Weinstein, N. ORCID: https://orcid.org/0000-0003-2200-6617 and Amar, M. (2026) Listening across the divide: high-quality listening promotes speakers’ state wellbeing through basic psychological need satisfaction during disagreements. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. ISSN 0022-3514 doi: 10.1037/pspi0000525

Abstract/Summary

People regularly disagree, but disagreements come at a cost to relationships and wellbeing when communication is poor. We posited that high-quality listeners who convey their clear attention, understanding, and positive intention can turn a disagreement into a constructive experience for speakers and those expressing their views. Informed by SelfDetermination Theory, we examined whether receiving high-quality listening would improve speakers’ state well-being and its future-oriented component, state optimism, by satisfying the psychological needs for relatedness, autonomy, and competence. Across five studies (N=1,624), three of which were preregistered, and using diverse methods including experimental vignettes, live conversations, recalled conversations, and a multilevel field survey, we compared high-quality, moderate-quality (Studies 1-5), and low-quality (Study 1) listening when conversing partners agreed or disagreed. Speakers who experienced high-quality listening consistently reported greater state well-being, state optimism, and basic psychological need satisfaction. The main effects on state wellbeing and state optimism were consistently mediated by relatedness need satisfaction. Although the indirect effects via autonomy and competence varied, an internal metaanalysis showed that both significantly mediated state well-being and state optimism. Importantly, in Studies 3 and 4, high-quality listening during a disagreement resulted in higher speakers’ state well-being than moderate-quality listening during an agreement. These findings challenge the assumption that disagreement is inherently divisive and extend interpersonal relationship research by providing a better understanding of its consequences. They point to listening quality as a pathway to state well-being and social connection, even when views are opposing.